Wednesday, August 22, 2007

"No Solicitors"

Maybe not everyone knows what that means. Maybe instead the sign on the door of my workplace should read, "We will NOT buy or even act interested in anything you are trying to sell us. Please go away."

As the person who's at the front desk, I have to deal with all the human spam that walks past the no soliciting sign. Today I had a particularly poignant example of this...

Three young guys with their button-down shirts and their khaki pants strut into my front office. They proceed to give me their sales schpeel, even after I point out that the sign on the door says that we do not like solicitors coming into our workplace. The ringleader grins, folds his arms, and leans across my counter, continuing with a lame sales pitch. I tell them, "no, we really aren't interested." They continue. I tell them very emphatically, "we are really not interested. thank you." They finally get that I'm not biting and leave. Here's what I wish I would've thought (and had the nerve) to say:

"Look, bucko. One: There is a "no soliciting" sign on our door, and you are clearly soliciting. Two: DO NOT try to flirt with me to sell your stupid stuff because it's condescending and I'm married. Three: Clearly you have no idea what kind of business this is. We do behavioral interventions with autistic children, and we receive all our clientèle through referrals from school districts and regional centers. We don't need your advertising. and Four: I don't even like baseball! Go away!"

9 comments:

AK said...

I always think up great replies like that long after the situation is over. And, how insulting that they would think that you are not intelligent enough to know that they are flirting with you to get you to buy something. That makes me so angry!!! I'm sure they saw the sign and thought, "Hey, we look nice. We can flirt. Surely when we walk in there and she sees how hot we are she will completely forget the rules." It also makes me angry when people think that they don't have to follow the rules like everyone else. Wow. I don't know why that got me so worked up... Good for you staying strong like that!

RC said...

:-) if only you had a spam button on your desk that would open up a secret floorboard in the floor and turn these guys into spam.

i get solicitors too where I work. For many reasons, I try to be friendly. I'm sure you can know why.

db said...

These guys are getting paid to break the rules and act the way they do...they really have kind of a hard job...can you imagine having to DO that? Yikes! I guess they must be overly self confident and have a lot of bravado in the first place to do the job...
I like your use of the word "bucko" I love that word!

Kimberly said...

Ugh, I can't stand people like that. I'm thinking you probably see a lot of interesting people who wander in since you're the first person they would see. They were probably shocked that you didn't play along :-)

Etano said...

Don't like baseball!?!?

RC said...

i no you clear ask for no solicitation, but can i solicite a caLIfe update?

Suzy and Brian said...

Isn't that always the case that we think of the greatest things to say AFTER the fact? Unless your name is Anthony Kirchner--he always seems to have something right then and there. Or that's the impression I get from Brian's stories, ha-ha. Way to stick to your guns and not fall for the probably CA hottie ;o).

Jon said...

I think it's time for some more blogging! You've been silent for too long! State your opinion! Share a story! Entertain the world!

(Seriously, more than a month? Come on!)

RC said...

yep...still reading the same post again...it's good but not that good.

(i think i'm going to comment everytime i come here and see this post)